Hey blog fam! Time to talk about toxic relationships.
What can make a blooming happy relationship turn toxic, you might be wondering. Stop! Don’t. A toxic relationship has always been toxic from the very beginning but it’s toxicity gets masked by new love, once you start feeling a little comfortable in this relationship, the toxicity starts to show its ugly head.
What is my definition of a toxic relationship? This relationship is a one-sided and selfish relationship, where one partner emotionally and sometimes physically abuse the other. This type of relationship is emotionally, mentally, physically and all round draining, it successfully steals away the self esteem of the abused partner.
The signs of a toxic relationship most times are always out in the open for all to see. Your mom, brother, friends and entire family are going to notice these signs sometimes, they might warn you but you might want to ignore their warnings. Sometimes you know and see these signs but you refuse to let go because you think you are so much in love and you might not find someone better.
What?! No baby-girl, it’s time to leave that shithead of a man for someone that knows your worth, values you and will treat you way better. It’s time to woman up and walk away for the best.
OK, I got a little too passionate about this topic! It’s allowed. Now, here are some warning signs that shows in a toxic relationship.
1. TAKING BUT NOT GIVING:
A toxic partner loves to collect stuffs, ask for favors and so on but when you really need them they will be no where to be found. You are only loved when you’re needed and deserted when you’re not.
2. ZERO EFFORTS TO BETTER YOUR UNION OR FRIENDSHIP:
While you’re giving your time and best efforts to improve your togetherness, they seem to be unbothered about it. They don’t care if the relationship lives or die.
3. CONSTANT BELITTLING:
A toxic partner is always quick to dismiss your ideas or consider you as a person as unimportant. They will always want to speak derogatory words to you to bring down your esteem and make you feel like the bad person. Just a constant mind manipulation to keep you feeling like you don’t deserve better and no one can love you better but it’s all false. You definitely deserve so much more.
4. KEEPING YOU IN ISOLATION:
Toxic partner enjoy isolating their vulnerable partners from loved ones and from social gathering in general. The presence of a third party causes them great discomfort.
5. ONE SIDED APOLOGIES:
You will find yourself apologizing all the time for stuffs you did and didn’t do, mostly for offenses you didn’t commit. You just can’t risk getting them angry because you don’t know what the outcome will be. This is just energy draining because now you live in constant fear in your relationship, you don’t love him anymore now you fear him. The difference is clear.
6. CONSTANT FEAR:
Now to my next point, you get scared of what your partner’s next actions will be. You can’t risk an argument because you don’t know if it will be accompanied with some verbal or physical abuse. You’re too scared to let go because you don’t know what will be done to you. Hey… nothing will be done to you, it’s time to walk away.
7. NO TRUST:
You don’t believe anything that comes out of their mouth, you always feel like they are doing something really bad behind their back even if they’re not. A relationship without trust really can’t grow.
You constantly lie to your toxic partner to keep the peace. Like what is not known won’t hurt or cause trouble, right? Hmm.. true but in a healthy relationship you needn’t lie because it’s a judgement free union.
9. POOR COMMUNICATION:
When the communication lines in your relationship are compromised, then there is no relationship as communication is the oxygen that keeps a relationship healthy and alive.
10. NO RESPECT:
When you, your ideas, opinions or presence is constantly disrespected by your partner, then it’s time to go because respect is one of the most important elements that makes up a good relationship.
A toxic relationship is definitely not a safe place, it’s time to get out girlfriend. This topic is really close to my heart because I was once in a toxic relationship and it took the grace of God and a few years for me to finally walk away. So, I know it won’t be so easy to walk away but you have to gather boldness and exercise your strength to walk away for good. A better, more deserving relationship awaits you.
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Much Love ❤️