Hello blog fam! I absolutely value good friendships. I believe good friends are hard to come by but when you meet them it’s absolutely worth it.
But today, I’m not here to speak on the healthy friendships! Let’s touch on the opposite. The bad and toxic. A toxic Friendship is just like been in a toxic romantic relationship, it’s stressing and subtly emotionally draining. It’s always pretty good in the beginning, delightful even “best friend vibes” but the toxic signs kind of like slowly creep in and it’s always hard to point out.
So, have you been wondering if your friend is good for you or not? Well, what can I say? Here are some telltale signs of a toxic friend.
1. YOUR ACCOMPLISHMENTS UPSET THEM:
In friendships, there is always room for healthy competition and also both parties should be happy for one another when success is achieved. But in this case, your friend just does not approve of your success. They’re always just plain jealous when you make headway in your career or in other areas of your life. They feel they should be better than you in all aspects and when that doesn’t happen, they despise your intelligence.
2. THEY ALWAYS TRY TO BRING YOU DOWN:
They enjoy speaking down on you to make themselves feel better, some sly comments like “oh you look fat in that dress” or “I would have done that better” and also maybe calling you insultive names might seem innocent and you might laugh it off but you shouldn’t laugh it off because a good friend wouldn’t want to say things to make you feel bad about yourself even in a joking way.
3. DELIBERATE BELITTLING:
You’re out with your other group of friends and then they deliberately try to humiliate you in front of others. Basically public shaming you! You tell them that shouldn’t repeat itself, they tell you ” why are you so pressed, I was only kidding” Hell no! A good friend won’t subject you to ridicule in public but instead have your back when someone tries to ridicule you. So if the shaming is coming from your own friend, yeah, that says a-lot.
4. THEY SPEAK ILL ABOUT YOU BEHIND YOUR BACK:
When not with you, they speak bad of you, your relationship, your career and almost everything that has your name on it. Totally betraying your trust and just rubbing you in mud in the eyes of the public. Definitely a trait a good friend shouldn’t portray.
5. TAKE BUT NEVER GIVE:
Just like in a romantic relationship, a toxic friend is always up and ready to collect but never willing to give anything in return. Though we should always give without expecting nothing in return. Yes true. But in friendship, you should always be willing to offer support to each other when needed, that shouldn’t be one sided.
6. THEY WANT TO BE BETTER THAN YOU:
They don’t ever want to think you’re going ahead of them. They want to have a better house, car, job, partner, bank account, basically a better everything in contrast to yours. They kind of want to be the alpha in your friendship, so when you’re beneath they’re satisfied. Most times toxic friends don’t like competition so they just befriend someone they can control easily and someone that is comfortable with just being okay in life.
7. THEY ARE COVETOUS:
They want everything you gave your eyes on. And I mean everything! That cute guy that you liked, your friend starts to flirt with him and boom they’re dating. Once they notice what you want is interesting, then they want it too and they will do everything possible to get it before you do.
8. YOU’RE DISPOSABLE TO THEM:
Once they meet a new friend, they abandon you for days even months. No calls, no text. Till maybe when their supposed new friend travels out of town, then they remember they have a friend in you. No! A good friend should never abandon you for someone they met in few hours.
9. THEY’RE TERRIBLE TO OTHERS:
They always exhibit nasty, disgusting and disrespectful behavior towards others. So by doing so, everyone thinks you both have the same attitude and that is just not okay when your friend’s social behavior gives you a bad reputation.
10. YOU WANT TO GET RID OF THEM:
When it comes to this point in a friendship. Then it’s totally toxic. You always try to avoid them at all times, cancelled plans seem like heaven’s intervention. You just like who you are when you are not with them and you’ve totally lost interest in the friendship.
Finally, a toxic friendship is no friendship and you will be better off with no friends than with a toxic friend.
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Much Love ❤️